Dirty Stops Out – Dj Trev’s June buddy

5 June 2014

Last Saturday was a big night.

I get the impression that was the case for pretty much everyone in town given that my facebook news feed was jammed with DJs saying things like “cooolo, rewind ma selecta one time it’s goin’ off” or “town is banging 2 da max 2nite murderation biznizz big up your chest soundbwoy” and suchlike. Personally I had an amazing night at my new residency on the top floor of Rehab. But I hope to give you an insight into the soaring highs and crushing lows in the life of a DJ by recounting the following scenario from that night:

Saturdays on the Top floor are a rock night; indeed it is the new home for Bottom of the Bottle, which is a Hard Rock night I’ve been running in town for nearly 13 years. Last week early doors we had a Burlesque night which was awesome fun and really buzzing, made better by the fact that there was an ACTUAL model working it. I made fleeting reference to her last week in this column, because her facebook page is arguably the greatest thing to happen to society since the ancient Greeks invented society. So anyway I was looking forward to meeting her and had brushed my teeth and everything. She’s a pretty cool person as it goes: quite a lot of attitude but is still prepared to laugh at the appropriate moments when I say crap jokes, which is a big deal for someone like me who only really has that to offer. And so it was that whilst internally I was picking out names for our children (of which there would have been many), I happened to ask her what kind of music she likes. She replied immediately with “I LOVE Rihanna”. You know when you laugh at something, than realise the person isn’t joking… That.

So ok, no one is perfect – I mean, if you look CLOSELY at me you will notice I have a stupid moustache and frankly bizarre mullet – so I decided to persevere and go into this, and said hoping (nay, praying) for a negative to the following: “I bet you like Drake and Chris Brown and Neo too don’t you?”. To which she replied “Oh my god they are all awesome”.
So the wedding is off.

After finishing work at 4am I’d recovered from this heartbreak and had really had an amazing night. This was in part due to the fact that I’m a DJ in a club, and lots of girls were paying me attention and laughing at my crap jokes. Suitably buoyed I deciding to utilise my burgeoning good mood and go to Moko, which is the late night venue of choice for us in the industry. It was rocking there too; I’m not sure who was DJing at that point but they were playing some really great house music and I got to see a load of ace people who I rarely get to party with. This was however all slightly marred by the fact that whilst I was still technically trying to be on the rebound from the greatest love story that never was, girls kept using me as a human shield from all the creepy guys who were hitting on them.

I’m like: come on, give ME a chance and I will be one of those creepy guys! But now it seems as far as girls are concerned, when I’m not on a DJ stand I have become the equivalent of a big brother, or their gay friend. Or a toothless hound. Nevertheless it was an excellent night all round, so here’s to hoping that summer has arrived and we can look forward to some more excellent weekends.
Theoretically we are all well set up for that, as this weekend has loads on. The full listings are a few paragraphs below (subject to me writing a few paragraphs) but I will pick out a few of the less regular things for your delectation: for example, The Den has two sets of live music, on Friday Motor City Blue play Blues, Rock & Soul covers. Then there is The Den’s regular Saturday Acoustic gig, which this week has Elliot Long on at 5pm. I ate there again yesterday and really cannot recommend the Prawn and Avocado salad to you highly enough. I feel like I could write a poem about how delightful it is, but as you will have by now surmised, I are not good with words. So I’ll simply say The Den’s Prawn and Avocado salad is wel good.

Harrogate’s longest serving DJ (other than me), Stray FM’s Sir Alex B. Cann (who’s initial and second name sounds like a person with a Jamaican accent saying “Bacon”, which, interestingly, sounds like me saying “beer can”) is embarking on a mini world tour of Harrogate this week. He’s playing tonight (Thursday) at Retro Bar, doing his floorfillers set, which is the stuff he plays on the radio on Saturdays, when I’m sat at home watching life pass me by. Then on Saturday he’s at the Bilton Working Men’s Club doing a 70’s night. I’m going to call this a score draw between me and Alex, as whilst he has cracked on and gotten himself a lot of radio shows and I have just sat at home writing long passages on how girls don’t like me, Alex IS doing a 70’s night, which I managed to stop doing around about 1979.

The next generation of Harrogate DJs are out in force on Friday. Lure Bar has the 13 records pre Ibiza showcase, which is a house night featuring the likes of Oli Hodges, Kain Fox and Kit Mason on the decks. At the other end of the musical spectrum, at Retro Bar on Friday Jamie Bramhall puts “Blood and Thunder” on this week. This is arguably the heaviest Metal night within a 30 mile radius and is well worth checking out if you like your riffs shredded and your Head Machined. Whilst I’m talking about rock nights (and doing really rather well to not reference the fact that every Saturday on the top floor of rehab I play a rock night etc etc) last week I went for a bit of a night out on Tuesday. I ended up at Moko Lounge, which has two rooms open, with a decent sounding upfront Dj in the main bit, whilst in the VIP Room there is “Rock Box”. This is Jaye’s weekly night and it is well cool. The playlist is mainly metal and gothy stuff, some great tunes really, and it has a very seriously dedicated hardcore following. Tuesdays have some good options as it goes; I also visited Revolution Bar, which has “Back to Rev’s”, where Toby Skinner plays decent House music and all the drinks are Half Price; and up on John Street Pitcher & Piano have “Re:Session” where pints of Amstel were £2, if memory serves (bearing in mind that the £2 a pint of Amstel thing will not have helped my memory any). Also worth checking out on Tuesday is Rehab’s open deck night, the policy of which really opens things up to a good and varied range of Djs. For example, I heard a UK Hardcore set last week, which really isn’t something you get oftentimes in little old Harrogate. And very good it was too. Next week on Tuesday, I’m toying with the idea of going to The Blues Bar, as they have live music from The Pete Oliver Band. Pete runs the open mic there on Mondays which is a really good night. I’m not generally into open mic’s and that, but Mondays are really well run and there has always been a really cracking range of musical skilliance on show every time I’ve been, so I reckon Tuesday will be worth checking out to see Pete put it all on show, as it were.

Back to the weekend, on Friday Bilton Working Men’s Club has a charity night in aid of the Yorkshire Air Ambulance, with Liam Grey performing live. This is great for me to write about, as not only is the Air Ambulance a very worthy cause, but Liam Grey is also playing another gig, in a cause that is particularly close to my heart (namely: me, getting paid) and I can segway from talking about charity to talking about myself seamlessly . It’s next week at Rehab, on the evening of England’s opening World Cup game. So next Saturday, after I’ve played Bed Fest at Henshaws in Knaresborough I am flying back to Harrogate in an executive Gold Plated Helicopter for doors opening at Rehab at 8pm. Liam will be playing from then until just before the 11pm kick off, when the commentary from the game will be on and you can watch it all on the newly installed big screen. This is on the top floor, with business as usual downstairs; so you could, if you so wished, drop off your mates who don’t like football down there for a dance. Afterwards we will celebrate England’s inevitable victory with Party rock music until 4am.

Before then, THIS Saturday is the Oatlands Gala which makes me remember a time I used to travel around Gala’s and Fairs telling Coconut Stall owners their stalls were getting too old. I used to be the shy retiring type.
In a shocking record 5th (F.I.F.T.H.) reference to my Rock night at Rehab, top floor every Saturday, this week there is no live music early doors as we are saving it for The Pirate Party that is coming up, however if you want live music on Saturday, The Blues Bar welcomes back Jed Thomas who has been in Ireland playing at The Rory Gallagher festival. Meanwhile Retro Bar has The Yum playing, who are an indie outfit over from Leeds. I’ve already mentioned Elliot Long at The Den on Saturday afternoon, thus since I am starting to repeat myself about things other than my Saturday night residency at Rehab (top floor, this week 10pm – 4am, free entry) I will just do this next bit then go to the listings:
Creationist Watch
For my creative fan base (I really would have expected creative people to have something better to do with their time that read this article, however each week without fail one or four of them like to get in touch with me offering pointers on my punctuation for, some reason’s) well into the future, on August Bank Holiday Sunday the Round Table are holding a soap Box Derby in the Valley Gardens. They are currently looking for teams for this, if you want to take part it’s on facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/events/1410655705883120/ . Before then, if you are looking for something to do on Sunday, Henshaws Arts & Crafts Center in Knaresborough has, appropriately enough, an Arts & Crafts Fair there.

Here’s the listings:
Blues Bar, live music from The Sharon Colgan Band, Free entry.
Lure Bar, Dj Trev’s Quiz of crapness. Followed by, of his own invention, the Patented “Crap Disco”, with party, 80’s, pop, cheesy rock, soul, swing and shoddiness.
Viper Rooms Nightclub YOLO R’n’B nigh.
Rehab Nightclub with Dj Tex. “Urban R’n’B”.
The Alexandra, Live music, free entry.
Christies Bar, Pub quiz with Sean McGrath.
FRIDAY 6th June
Lure Bar, 13 Records pre Ibiza showcase. House Music with Dj’s Oli Hodges, Kain Fox & Kit Mason.
Live music at The Den: Motor City Blue.
Blues Bar, Live music with Lions for a Day. Free Entry.
Bilton Working Men’s Club, Yorkshire air ambulance charity night with Liam Grey.
Moko Lounge, Shakalakaboom club night with a weird name.
Lure Bar, Shuffle with Dj Sixus, Funk, House & Breaks.
Rehab Nightclub, “Electro Circus” dance Night.
Oatlands Gala.
The Den, Saturday Afternoon live: Elliot Long, 5pm
The Blues Bar, live music with The The Brothers Groove.
Bilton Working Mens Club, 70’s night with Alex B. Cann.
The Blues Bar, live music from Jed Thomas Blues Band, Free entry.
The Regency, live music from M.O.A.B. plus guest by invitation.
Revolution Bar, front bar Dj Tex (Soul & R’n’B), main room Disco Dave (upfront dance and chart) free entry.
Rehab nightclub, two floors of music: Top Floor : Bottom of the Bottle Rock night with Dj Trev (THIS NIGHT HARDLY GET’S A MENTION IN THIS COLUMN, IT’S NOT VERY FAIR). Downstairs: dance music with Dj Wayne & James. Free entry.
Vipers Rooms Nightclub Dj Angel Lee & The Legendary Neil Jaques playing tunes for upfront clubbing upstairs, Harvey Westwood downstairs.
Christies Pub, Sean McGrath’s Cheesy disco, free entry.
SUNDAY 8th June
Henshaws Arts & Crafts Center, Knaresborough. Summer Arts & Crafts Fair.
Blues Bar, live music all Day. The Reeds 3pm, TJ & The Suitcase 6pm & Six String Social 9pm.
Pitcher & Piano, live music from Dan Burnette.
Rehab nightclub, Dj Trev’s Sunday Social.
Viper Rooms. Peek-a-Boo R’n’B night.
Hales Pub, live acoustic night.
Fat Badger, Cold Bath Road, Pub Quiz.
MONDAY 9th June
The Harlow Inn, Otley road, Pub Quiz.
So! Bar, Otley Road, Pub Quiz.
Blues Bar, fully hosted fully entertaining open mic session, hosted by Pete Oliver.
Moko Lounge nightclub, Karaoke..
TUESDAY 10th June
The Blues Bar live music with The Pete Oliver Band, Free entry.
Billy Ocean live at The Royal Hall.
The Tap n’ Spile pub, folk night.
Pitcher & Piano Re:Session cheap drinks night.
Moko Lounge Nightclub, “Skint” main room upfront dance and electro, VIP Room Rock Box Rock night Dj Jaye Selway.
Revolution Bar, “Back to Rev’s” House Night, Half Price Drinks with Dj’s Tex & Sixus.
Coach and Horses Pie and Peas night with proceeds to Martin’s House Children’s Hospice.
The Harlow Pub “Midweek Madness” pub quiz with Dj Tim Paul.
Pitcher & Piano Quiz night from 8pm. Free for new teams or £1.50 PP.
The Regency Pub, big screen quiz.
Rehab nightclub, Dj Max Czernic. Harrogate’s next big hair?
The Blues Bar, live music from the Paul Middleton Angst band .
This is still largely the same closing paragraph I used the week before last week AND the week before AND aaaaand the week before that. Pretty much since the dawn of time actually. Let’s face it, you’ve stopped reading already. I mean, I’ve said “you’ve stopped reading already haven’t you?” for the last 6 months and not one person has said “yes I have stopped reading” or better yet (but yet to happen) “No, I always read it to the end, give me a free t-shirt”. Instead all I get is people rinsing me on my punctuation. Should you wish to listen to some of my actual Dj’ing from the comfort of your own home, you can do that at Mixcloud.com/djtrevuk but really I’d much rather you can out and partied, not for my financial gain you understand, but for your emotional wellbeing.
Thanks for reading, drink responsibly and don’t be loose with your affections.
Trev x x x

1 Comment

  1. Since I may actually get a rare chance to visit you on a night out this week: “No, I always read it to the end, give me a free t-shirt”!!! Yes, I know, I’m hilarious :)

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