Dirty stoppage time

25 July 2013

Dirty Stops Out – Dj Trev’s guide to places to see faces and avoid head cases.

THURSDAY 25th July

Tonight, should you fancy it, you can see some people at the Blues Bar called The Rat Spankers. I assume that they are a band rather than a very specialist vermin based bondage performance art troupe, nevertheless, it’s a great name and conjures to mind rather unpleasant, yet disturbingly intriguing images.

I’m still in a wonderful world of guessing what’s on at the Alexandra. I saw Loz the manager the other day and meant to mention that he needed to send me his new poster, however it was at 3 in the morning, so instead it was the type of meeting of minds you’d expect at that stage; namely we hugged and and then had a fight over a kebab before hugging again. There was however, no kissing, as Loz is out of my league.

As ever, there is an R’n’B night on Viper Rooms called “Y.O.L.O.” tonight and if you can’t get enough of that slanty baseball cap stuff, there is an “official” pre-bar at Moko lounge. I think they are doing that because after the “official Yorkshire show after party” a few weeks ago and the “official end of year responsible drinking party” that created a stir in a tea cup last month, they have not had an “official party” for days. You must always be wary of going to bars that are not “official pre-bars” as they sometimes offer the same products, music and facilities as the official ones, and if the official ones didn’t tell you, you’d never know you weren’t drinking in the correct place. For example, yesterday, I dj’ed the “official” after party of Bruce Springsteen’s gig in Leeds. As far as I can work out, it was “official” in so far that it was a bar

quite close to the venue. Certainly hardly anyone from the gig came and I ended up playing the Macarina. It was not a career high for me. So the term “official” was rendered utterly pointless. I wonder if this is the case with those really great product placements you get for sporting events (EG: Tip-Ex, the official correctional fluid of of the London Olympics, or Daleside Blonde, the official hop-based beverage of Dj Trev after doing anything leaving him slightly out of breath.)? Perhaps I shall follow Viper Rooms “Official policy of promotion” policy and make everything I do the “official” something of something.

Rehab has Dj Tex upstairs at “FLEX ” tonight, playing R’n’B and stuff, whilst Downstairs at Rehab I’m playing the “official downstairs bar of Dj Tex’s upstairs bar at rehab official pre-post afterparty VIP” and it’s free to get in.

FRIDAY 26th July

Dr. Truth is playing at The Blues Bar tonight, and that is 100% true.

There’s live music every Friday at Zoso Bar, which is somewhat out of the way little bar down the back of Debenhams. This week they’ve got Hell Fire Jack playing, who are really worth checking out; I’ve raved about them in the past and will no doubt continue to do so until their incredibly sexy lead singer takes me out for a candle lit meal. Unlikely as that is to happen, I really think Hell Fire Jack will be ace tonight as the intimate feel of Zoso will be a great setting to see them, and you’ll be able to push up really close to their incredibly sexy lead singer and perhaps touch his bum without if feeling weird and invasive. Also playing are Lobo who’s bottoms I definitely wouldn’t touch, plus Those Delta Wolves, who’s bottoms may or may not be touchable, I don’t know.

Dave Sowden, who’s bottom gets a rating of 4, is running his “Sucker Punch” night this very evening at Retro Bar. Apparently Retro is open until 4am sometimes, which seems crazy mental, I’m not sure what time they are open til tonight, however I’d definitely recommend going to this as Dave has got a great taste in music and is a tip top type and is the official Dj of Sucker Punch which is my “”official“ top tip for the night.

If you are wondering what I am doing on Fridays, I am in Leeds at Electric Press Revolution, as Fridays for me are “the official night of playing lots of officially average records by Rihanna (the official artiste of people who have officially low expectations of music).”

SATURDAY 27th July

The Revolaters are playing The Blues Bar. They ain’t got no website mate so I can’t tell you anything about them, but I’m not having a go. I’m currently trying to set up an official facebook “fan” page for me ( I know, “fan”, how optimistic is that??) and it’s taking me ages. This internet thing is never going to catch on.

I’m the official dj at tonight’s “official Saturday night at the Den official late Bar venue with pool tables and stuff” which is the official after party venue for staff from restaurants to come and ask me for all their favorite official party anthems of people who’ve just finished work. It’s officially good sometimes. But whether it is a good night or not is, unofficially, between me and you, very little to do with me and my abilities or lack thereof.

Elsewhere for Saturday it’s business as usual:

Rehab is Free to get in, upstairs Dj Pieman plays rock music, while they have Dj Wayne and James downstairs. Recently I’ve been mocking (albeit in a playful manner) Dj Wayne for only playing Faithless “Insomnia” but in the interest of full disclosure, I went to Rehab last Saturday and listened to Wayne for about 40 minutes and he never once played it, and was actually playing some right nice upfront dance music and it was a good night. SO, unusually, it seems I may have been wrong about something. I cheerfully withdraw my remarks about Dj Wayne always playing Faithless “Insomnia”. Hmm, if I’m not going to write that every week I need something else to always write and playfully tease… Where to look….

Disco Dave always plays a big long bootleg of Robin S “Show me love” at Revolution on Saturdays, where it is free to get in. Dj Tex is also on in the front bar, but I dareds’d not playfully mock him, as he is one of them hip-hop types and will no doubt pop a cap in my posterior if I do.

Lure has a Dj on again on Saturdays, I went in and he seemed to be mainly playing retro-ish dance music, which makes a nice change from literally 4 out of every 5 of the other places in town that seem to be playing dance music in a kind of retro style. Lure did however also play some nice late 80‘s soul and rare groove later in the night that was really good and actually WAS different to everywhere else.

Viper rooms will officially be open as will Moko, with their Official Saturday night night, which has Alex Simmons Djing who is officially actually a very good dj.

SUNDAY 28th July

The Blues Bar does live music all day on Sundays, The Reeds are there in the afternoon whilst, having clearly spent a little longer on coming up with a name, The Barsteward Sons of Val Doonican play the evening.

Sunday Soundcheck is a weekly acoustic night at the Alexandra, but they arrange their line up’s on the fly so as I write this I dunno who is playing. All the line ups so far have been good though and it’s free to get in, so well worth a look.

There are also the usual clubbing options for Sundays, Viper rooms holding it’s regular“Peek-a-boo” night at the Urban end of things, whilst I’m up at Rehab playing a sort of request night, but if you don’t know the difference between the term “ask for a request” and “furiously DEMAND a song, NEXT” please don’t ask for a request, as being treated like a trouser snake often offends.

MONDAY 29th July

The roll-over money-shot jack-pot at the Alexander’s pub quiz this week is £216. Dj Pieman presents this weekly wonder of tricky trivia, accompanied by free chillie for everyone entering!

Dj’s Max & Jake now run Zoso on Monday nights, playing, literally, anything from Deep Dubstep to Van morrison’s “Brown Eyed Girl”. There is the weekly open mic session at The Blues Bar with Pete Oliver, plus Moko Lounge at the junction of Kings Road and Parliament Street host “Mokioki”, their karaoki night which is quite amusing.


TUESDAY 30th July

Still quite a bit on for Tuesdays :

There is the Folk night at the Tap n’ Spile, whilst Blue bar has an “acoustic session” too.

There are two rooms open at Moko, in the VIP Room Jaey Selway presents her Rock Box, playing alternative and hard rock anthems, whilst in the main room Dee J Wyer plays upfront stuff.

Zoso plays host to The Electro Jam, which is an “open Decks” Dj session with an open invite to anyone to rock up and play. So if you’ve been unlucky enough to hear me Dj recently, why not turn up and prove that “I could do that better”, which is what I know you were thinking.

There is a night on at Revolution now on Tuesdays, but I still don’t know what it’s called. As I mentioned last week, when I was there on Tuesdays the night was called “Tueslife” which was my idea, but so far no cheque has arrived so I must presume it’s called something else.


As often tends to be the case, I’ve run out of steam writing this preview by Wednesday, I suspect most people have stopped reading by now. Still, to the best of my knowledge, Wednesdays are always :

Dj Pieman at Rehab

Paul Middleton’s Angst band swearing through the night at The Blues Bar.


For the last few months I’ve been presenting a show on Harrogatealternativeradio.co.uk . It obviously wasn’t any good as the station has now stopped broadcasting…

Nevertheless I’m not gonna let that put me off and I’m still going to stick a mix up weekly on mixcloud.com/djtrevuk . These will hopefully also get featured on what is going to become of the harrogatealternativeradio site. As far as I know the site is now going to be dedicated to showcasing Harrogate bands and DJ’s and their respective mixclouds and soundclouds and other on line resources. You can submit your own stuff to the site if you fancy – and don’t worry if you think it’s not very good, they feature my stuff and that’s TERRIBLE, so you’ve really nothing to lose. E-mail info@harrogatealternativeradio.co.uk if you are based in Harrogate or the surrounding areas and I’m told they will give you a listing, which is purdy cool yeah?

If you want to send me any listings, or tell me I’m wrong about anything, or be offended by my ill informed ravings, you can do all of that and SO much more at facebook.com/djtrev and please note, I swear far too much on pretty much everything I do online.

Thanks for reading, drink responsibly and don’t be loose with your affections.

Trev x x x



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.



Go toTop