Dirty Stops Out – Dj Trev’s “Wake me up when September ends” guide to a good night in bed, or a good night trying to get into someone else’s bed

Last week I started doing my monthly quiz at Lure and remarkably – particularly given that I went on about it at some length in last weeks column and the column only got published the day AFTER the quiz took place – quite a few of you actually came to it… I mean, I’m not even being sarcastic, it was ACTUALLY pretty good. I’ve always wanted to run a successful quiz night, and now I’ve done one, so I should probably stop…

But no, I’m going to carry on and spoil it, and the quiz returns to The Den on Thursday 2nd October… and soon I won’t remember that once, for a glorious couple of days, I could legitimately say my quiz night was busy. However, currently I am walking on proverbial clouds and I reckon I know how it must feel to be the dude who runs the Geek Pub quiz at Retro. That is a once a month affair too, and is always packed.
Unfortunately for the chronological narrative of this opening paragraph the Geek Pub Quiz isn’t back until the 19th of September, so if you actually want to do a quiz this Thursday I guess I’d better say go do Sean “The Bear” McGrath’s Quiz which is every Thursday at Christies. I’m mainly saying that because Sean is a big lad and I think he might break me if I don’t. Though to be fair, other than the fact that his manly size and main strength intimidates me, he is a top sort so I reckon his quiz will be a good un.



On Saturday at The Den there is a double header of live music with both Impyus & The Violets playing. Impyus are also playing at The Blues on Sunday according to their own press release (though it ain’t on the Blues Website, but I am not right good at the internet, indeed for several years I thought the internet was a place to meet people who are into fishnets. I was only half right.) it’s a busy weekend for this new band who have got some decent tunes and a quality sound.

Also on Saturday The Blues has got Francis playing live in the slot where Jed Thomas usually plays. This is like, what? The second holiday Jed has had in as many months? My word Jed, take it from a pro like me, you’ll never get anywhere taking that much time off. I’d love to go into this and other tips I have for working hard, but I need to go and mentally and physically prepare for my next 4 hour set of pressing play on a CD player, which is in 3 days time. I’m exhausted just thinking about it.

I’ve submitted this weeks column a couple of days early as, as previously discussed, I have a particularly busy week of killing time and kicking my heels planned; that said, whether this will get posted on the Wednesday is a thrilling roller coaster ride of mystery and suspense, as Harrogate-news is a maverick website that plays by it’s own rules, so this MIGHT get posted on Wednesday but equally it might be Sunday by which time the bulk of what I have written in the listings section will be rendered moot and /or obsolete. As Graham Westmoorland (lifetime reader, first time contributor) pointed out to me the other day whilst trying to sell me jam, somewhat bizarrely, he doesn’t read the listings bit anyway. I suspect that is the case for a lot of you… All of these variables and inconsistencies notwithstanding, IF this is posted on time on Wednesday, you have the chance to get to a real proper punk rock gig – it’s on TONIGHT (Wednesday 10th September) at The Regency pub and has got Sievehead, the excellent Bad Manifest and the equally good angular, aggressive, yet strangely lovely Bad Manifest, who are all supporting the superbly names Pregnancy Scares. Those guys are on a proper DIY UK tour and these underground events are really something; don’t expect high production values and pyrotechnics, but do expect good, honest, from the heart Punk Rock n’ Roll.

NEXT Wednesday, (17th) Major Tom’s Social on Wednesday has their monthly “Grub n’ Grog” night, starting at 6.30pm. Now it’s £5 entry with a free beer & “tidbits” on arrival but I don’t know if it (that is to say, I rather suspect it doesn’t) includes your food for the night. To be honest, Major Tom’s beer is always good and it’s a right nice place, so go and check it out and report back. I’d go myself but on Wednesdays, rather than drinking and eating, I play football, as my body is a temple. Indeed I make people take their shoes off before I let them inside it.

Back to this week, on Friday 12th there is a very big collective gig at The Bilton Working Mens Club. In aid of the Charity Fighting Ependymoma (which is a rare kind of brain cancer) this features a load of amazing bands, including York’s Excellent A Jokers Rage and the return of Harrogate’s C4 & Eric Bana from yesteryear.PIPS are on too and they rule… look there am loads of bands playing, I’ll put a link to the event so you can see for yourself. It runs from 6pm and entry is only £3 and there is a massive raffle with some really decent prizes too. Accompanied kids are welcome, so you can get them into decent music before they inexorably start to gravitate towards listening to “sexy R’n’B” that corrupts their minds, leads them away from the path of righteousness and probably makes them sniff “E” or something. So yeah, get a full night of rock in yer ere’, https://www.facebook.com/events/1444411145805528/ check it out.



This Saturday is my last Saturday at Rehab, and to celebrate this fact I’ve got a Burlesque night on from 9pm. It’s free to get in and the last one of these was really good. In fairness Saturdays have been really busy there recently, but frankly I can’t take getting “Teenage Dirtbag” shouted at me 376 times an hour anymore, so am off to a new residency in Manchester to get “play Blue Monday” shouted at me instead. Fortunately I have not grown sick of that song just yet… As to rehab, I’m still there on Sundays but I’m not sure who is taking over Saturdays. I am sure however that they at least will manage to smile politely when you scream “play more Blink 182” at them for the 40th time in as many minutes, rather than express their ire in a passive aggressive manner in a “what’s on” guide 4 days later. I actually think my close personal internet Jam dealer Graeme Westmooreland is coming this Saturday, as he just asked me on facebook what is on. In a fit of unexpected politeness I successfully managed to not point out that IF HE ACTUALLY READ the below bit he would know… but after writing this for nearly a year and a half I am fully aware that already you are starting to tune out as we got into….
This week’s bit that Graham Westmoorland, and probably you too, never bother to read, ie: The Listings:
WEDNESDAY 10th September
The Regency Pub, Hardcore Punk gig with Pregnancy Scares, Sievehead, Clean Shirts & Bad Manifest.
The Harlow Pub “Midweek Madness” pub quiz with Dj Tim Paul.
The Regency Pub, big screen quiz.
Rehab nightclub, Dj Max Czernic. Anything goes party set with Harrogate’s next big hair.
The Blues Bar, live music from the Paul Middleton Angst band .

THURSDAY 11th September
Graeme Westmoorland’s house: Free Party. This is a free party but is only really for Biker Gangs, CrackHeadds and people who like to put metal objects in the mircrowave.
The Blues Bar, live music from The Resonators.
Christies Pub quiz.
Viper Rooms Yolo R’n’B night.
Rehab, Flex R’n’B night.
The Blues Bar, Live Music from the Sharon Colgan Band

FRIDAY 12th September
Moko Lounge, Shakalaka Boom “Old School Party” night with a dodgy name.
The Den, Impyus & The Violets Live.
Graeme Westmoorland’s house: Free Day care for children with behavioural problems, with free matches and caffine provided.
Blue Bar, Snakewater Blues Band live, free entry.
Lure Bar, Shuffle with Toby Skinner. House, Breaks & Funk.
Rehab Nightclub, “Electro Circus” dance Night. Free entry.

SATURDAY 13th September
Blues Bar, live music with Francis.
Rift & Co. Bar, front bar Dj Tex (Soul & R’n’B), main room Disco Dave (upfront dance and chart) free entry.
Viper Rooms, Angel Lee & Neil Jaques upstairs, Harvey Westwood Downstairs. Door charge applies, or contact the venue for guest list before 11pm.
Moko Lounge, Drop Out house night. Door charge applies, or contact the venue for guest list before 11pm.
Rehab nightclub, two floors of music: Top Floor “Pussy’s Penthaus Burlesque night from 9pm, followed by Dj Trev (Rock, Indie, Party Rap, Alternative & Guilty Pleasures) ‘til 4am.Downstairs: Doors open 8pm with Pop & Dance music from Djs Wayne & James. Free entry.

SUNDAY 14th September
Blues Bar, live all day: Super Set 3pm, Impyus 6pm & Al Hughes 9pm.
Rehab Nightclub, Dj Trev’s Sunday Social, whatever music happens to be working that night, interspersed by terrible requests.
Viper Rooms. Peek-a-Boo R’n’B night.
Hales Pub, live acoustic night.
Graeme Westmoorland’s house: Open house FREE car boot sale. All items that are un-priced are FREE to a good home.
Fat Badger, Cold Bath Road, Pub Quiz.

MONDAY 15th September
The Harlow Inn, Otley road, Pub Quiz.
So! Bar, Otley Road, Pub Quiz.
Rehab, late bar.
Blues Bar, fully hosted fully entertaining open mic session, hosted by Pete Oliver.
Moko Lounge nightclub, Karaoke.

TUESDAY 16th September
The Blues Bar, The Bob Malone Band, Free entry.
The Tap n’ Spile pub, folk night.
Pitcher & Piano Re:Session cheap drinks night.
Rehab nightclub, Dj Max Czernic.
Moko Lounge Nightclub, “Skint” main room upfront dance and electro, PLUS SCI-FI special in the VIP Room Rock Box Rock night Dj Jaye Selway.
Rift & Co. Bar, “Back to Rev’s” House Night, Half Price Drinks with Toby Skinner.
Coach and Horses Pie and Peas night with proceeds to Martin’s House Children’s Hospice.

WEDNESDAY 17th September
The Harlow Pub “Midweek Madness” pub quiz with Dj Tim Paul.
Major Tom’s Social, Grub n’ Grog. £5 entry with a free beer & “tidbits” on arrival.
The Regency Pub, big screen quiz.

Graeme Westmoorland’s house: Free Coach Trips to Sea World, Orlando. Setting off every hour on the hour, our fully air conditioned coaches utilise cutting edge quantum mechanics to cut the journey time to Orland’s famous Sea Life park to 25 minutes. Whilst waiting for your coach (each of which comes equipped with a celebrity guide – who will YOU get? Jonny Depp, Christian Bale, Natalie Portman or Shakira?) feel free to browse Graeme Westmoorlands extensive gardens and house which is open to the public 367 days a year from 7am to 3am. Fully accessible with ample parking for 3000, you are invited to help yourself to the extensive range of home made Jams and Preserves at no charge, and also take part in fun activities for all the family such as putting cling film over the opening on the toilet, phoning chat lines in foreign countries, hiding opened packs of shell on parwns behind the skirting board and trying on and/or sniffing Graeme’s underwear. Poorly behaved un toilet trained dogs welcome.

Rehab nightclub, Dj Max Czernic. Anything goes party set with Harrogate’s next big hair.

The Blues Bar, live music from the Paul Middleton Angst band .

Thanks for reading, drink responsibly and don’t be loose with your affections.
Trev x x x


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