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Dirty stops out – Dj Trev’s Harrogate guide

Dj Trev from HarrogateDj Trev’s Harrogate guide to the amazing places between the drink and the regret.

In the legitimate arts, all this week until Saturday there is a what I can only describe as the ultimate cultural collaboration between acting and tea-rooms, which is also the launch of the Harrogate Theatre Young Company (actually, if this is aimed at the young, instead of referring to it as “the ultimate cultural collaboration”, I should say it’s a “Murda mash-up of bun’s and beef, bomba claat”, they’ll get that). It’s at Betties and is a play presented in the very world famous tea rooms (to be fair, I think Betties Tea Rooms can justifiably lay claim to the term World Famous. That said, I just got back from Wales and literally everyone who asked where I was from, upon hearing Harrogate, immediately said, “isn’t that the place that is near to Ripley, of Ripley’s world famous Ice Cream? I envy you and your proximity to Ripley’s world famous Ice cream, what was it like growing up near to the birth place of Ripley’s world famous ice cream? Here, let me buy you a drink and we can talk about Ripley’s World famous Ice cream”). So yeah, acting, tea and buns, the show is called “I could murder a Fat Rascal” and GET THIS, in the play the Rival Bakery is called “Trev’s Bakery”, which is, if I’m honest, the nicest tribute I’ve had paid to me yet. Regular readers will note that I allowed them to drop the “Dj” from “Dj Trev” so they didn’t have to pay me the several hundereds of pounds in licensing fee’s for using my trade mark, as I am Harrogate’s most benevolent Dj and marketable brand name.

If YOU would like to use the Dj Trev brand contact my marketing team TODAY. Just think how many people would be talking about “Dj Trev presents World Famous Ripley Ice Cream in association with Star wars figurines”. And all for a couple of grand. Think on. To get back to my original point however, this looks like a really cool innovative idea, and if you’re one of those people from Harrogate who’ve never actually been to the place that people DO travel hundereds of miles in a coach to visit, you could make a night of it. It’s not cheap, but then Betties isn’t, and £25 includes the show AND food, which I reckon is pretty decent value.


There is a thing called The Midsummer Jukebox Dance at The Cairn hotel, but that is all I know about it… It’s a pretty cool name though. I like a good Jukebox, people often say that I’m essentially just a jukebox with a face, but I feel that analogy has flaws…. For example, I have never heard of someone biting a jukebox in the face because it didn’t play the song that it had played 20 minutes ago “next, right?”.

The Kings ov Leon are playing at the Alexandra tonight.. Now, as far as tribute act names go, I don’t really think “The Kings oV Leon” are trying particularly hard. “The Kinks of Leon” would be a far better name and they could do a bomba claat mash up of Kinks and Kings of Leon songs that I think would make them more world famous than Ripley Ice Cream. However, I’ve not seen them, the change of the word “of” to “ov” could in fact be a black metal thing (I’m pretty down with the black metal scene, and those wacky church burning funnsters do that) so perhaps The Kings Ov Leon will open up with a song called “This church is on fire”. To that end I think lots of mental religious people should go with banners and stuff proclaiming that rock music is the devils tool. I’m not joking. That would be awesome wouldn’t it? Particularly given that a Kings of Leon tribute is about as far from Sacrelicious black metal as you can get. Hence I feel the “Kings ov Leon” should change their name to “the Kings of Lying”. Or perhaps “Dj Trev presents the Kings of Leaning” (that’ll be 50 quid though).

Viper Rooms have their regular Thursday night called Y.O.L.O. tonight, playing R’n’B and stuff, it’s an independence day” party, as far as I can work out the main selling point is that you can get drinks in red cups… Is this a big thing? Is this where I’m going wrong? Also, I should probably find out how much it is to get in, though I don’t think that people who go there care about such things. Meanwhile up the road I appeal to the more “I’m not bloody paying to get in to watch this muppet, he doesn’t even have red cups” crowd, at rehab, as it’s free to get in and I’m worth every penny. Dj Tex is upstairs playing R’n’B and upfront tunes, whilst downstairs I play sort of mainstream rock and miscellaneous stuff that no one likes.

The Sharon Colgan Band are playing at The Blues Bar tonight, I’ve not seen them for about ten years, but the fact they are still playing makes me think they are still going to be good.

FRIDAY 5th July

The monthly ska & reggae night returns to Zoso this week, with The Unity Reggae Band and Lence playing live, plus DJ’ing from The Gorilla Sound System. I’m pretty sure I met one of the Gorilla Sound System recently, and whist there was no noteable similarity to a Gorillas, he is a seriously cool guy, and this night seems to be building up a strong following, so I’m gonna give it a “Dj Trev’s world famous Top tip” for the night. I would like to get my top tip’s sponsored, if you are a business leader or supplier of alcoholic beverines, get in touch with my marketing team TODAY. Imagine how awesome “Dj Trev’s Top tip in conjunction with Daleside Brewery” would look on a T-shirt, sticker, or perhaps keg of beer in my kitchen. So anyway, my top tip for tonight is the reggae night at Zoso.

Rehab still runs it’s regular Friday night club event that’s been going for a good few years now, it’s called Electro circus and features Dj’s Sam Moss & Jack Crowley.

Also playing live on Friday are The Mentull’s at The Blues Bar, who have been nominated for Best Young Artist at The British blues awards for this year.


Rip Shock festival is on in Ripon, and whilst slightly out of my target constituency, I reckon this looks pretty good, Dj Snuff is playing as are Purple Mafia and Rosie, and the increase of these smaller local festivals can only be a good thing. It’s at the Ripon youth Centre and is FREE! Hurrah!

After the huge success of last week’s “promoting responsible drinking event” , Moko lounge are “Re-launching” this Saturday following what they call “an extensive refit”. I’m pretty sure they’ve been open for the last week anyway, but Saturday is the official launch. Promoters, as well as being responsible and sensible well rounded individuals like myself, also tend to shy away from unnecessary hyperbole and over statement; to give you an example here’s a quote from their own sublimely humble facebook page “The new layout does justice to (our) reputation for providing the best contemporary club/bar design… always brought a fresh, edgy clubbing and musical experience to Harrogate and the team behind the UK’s largest superclub, The Syndicate, and the leading style bar/club The Viper Rooms has once again reinvented and

enhanced Moko’s pedigree and reputation by transforming the club’s key areas.” which seems like a fair and even handed description of themselves, just don’t damn yourself with faint praise will you guys? Fair play though, Alex Simmons is the new resident on Saturday and he is a great Dj, and whenever I’ve been on Saturday’s to Moko it is a good night out.

Jed Thomas’ Blues Band return to The Blues Bar this week, I still don’t know what time he’s on stage. I think I need to stop bringing attention to this lack of knowledge on my part, clearly no one is going to tell me. Mind you, I’m barely aware of what time I’m meant to start playing, let alone what other people are doing.

I think I start about 9pm this Saturday at the Den, in my sporadic Saturday night residency. I really enjoyed it last week, playing everything from Disco and house through to indie and rock, regular reader Jason even took the time to come over and say he liked my column…. Chortle, “column”. I wish everybody “liked” my “column”.

Rehab has two floors open on Saturday, with your Dj Pieman upstairs playing mainstream rock & party, whist downstairs Dj Wayne is still playing faithless “Insomnia”. Entry is free, I should have mentioned earlier that rehab has some nice new sofa’s in the front bit, I’m not sure they could or would say they’ve “enhanced their pedigree and reputation by transforming the club” with some new sofa’s, plus to be honest on Saturday it’ll probably be too busy for you to see the sofa’s, but I do think they are an improvement so I’m giving them positive reinforcement, which is what they did to me once when I broke the record bar take there for like the 17th time and they said “that was good thanks”.

Revolution is free in on Saturdays and has two rooms of tunes, Dj Tex is in the front bar and the main room has Disco Dave with his “if it ain’t broke don’t try to fix it” set of up front dance and party and that Robin S booteleg that must be nearly worn out by now?

The Viper rooms have The Ministry of Sound’s 90’s anthems night on this week. This looks quite good, but on their face book event the second track you can “expect to hear” is Lola’s theme by the Shapeshifters. Which is DEFINITELY the best 90’s dance anthem, that is to say, the best dance track that came out in the 90’s.. The fact that it actually came out in 2004, for me, just makes it even more of a 90’s dance anthem from the 90’s.

SUNDAY 30th June

Usually I only give a “dj Trev’s top tip in conjunction with Jaguar Cars” on a Sunday if it’s one of my nights, howev’s, this week a geezer called Shaun is running a gig at the 1919 venue at Harrogate town. Headlining are Momma Knows Best, who are a superb Hardcore/Metal out fit currently on tour from the Czech Republic. These guys sound awesome, I’m currently working out how I can get to this and also still be able to go to work… Support on the night comes from A R C H E T Y P E who are also on a European tour, plus I suspect by the time the event comes there will be a couple of local supports on the bill. Tickets are a fiver and doors open 7pm. It’s a pretty big ask these days putting on two touring bands in Harrogate, so if you’re into the hardcore & metal scene’s you should try support this if you can, people will only put on gigs as long as people support them and really, what else does a fiver get you these days? Ten lives on “candy crush”? Get a life!

The Fat Badger runs their pub quiz on Sundays and my mate Channy who is sat next to me as I write this is one of them student types who went to it recently and says he didn’t win. But students these days know nothing so don’t worry about that. Plus he’s studying film making… Good one, Kubric. I have said Kubric, cos I couldn’t spell Scoresaiysee.

Viper Rooms has Peek-a-boo R’n’B night for something a bit more mainstream, whilst I’m up the road at Rehab again, one of them nights will be good, sometimes both of them are, who knows, it’s Sunday, suck it and see.

The Dan Burnett Band are playing The Blues Bar, and he’s great, I have however made reference to his David Brent little beard in the past, and won’t bring it up again.



Channy is starting to moan that I’ve taken ages to write this, and in fairness, he’s correct, there’s a whole world out there I need to watch from the window of a coffee shop, so here’s briefly what is on on Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays:

MONDAY 8th July

Zoso have Tom Kellet’s open mic night and Pete Oliver likewise presents an open-mic at The Blues Bar.

Up at the Alexander, Dj Pieman’s Pub Quiz is on every Monday, he sent me this, slightly confusing information: “Money Shot Jackpot is £281 this week. There’s nine doors left with three having a Happy Ending. A quarter, semi and full load of jackpot cash to be won.” I think he’s trying to be rude. Saucy boy that he is… It’s agood quiz, and Pieman entertians you with saucy inbetween question banter, involving much better puns than the ones he sent me.

Finally if you want to party into the morning, Moko has their Monday night Karaoki on until the last man is standing.


TUESDAY 9th July

There is the Folk night at the Tap n’ Spile every Tuesday, but if you couldn’t give a folk about that, at the club end of the spectrum Moko has a night on with two rooms, in the VIP Room Jaey Selway presents her Rock Box, playing alternative and hard rock anthems, whilst in the main room Dee J Wyer plays upfront stuff, it’s been a while but the last time I was there both rooms were playing really good music. Round the corner at Zoso The Electro Jam continues which is kind of an “open Decks” Dj session, anyone can rock up and play whatever they like, the standard has always been high when I’ve been, this is a real nice night out.


Rehab is the only club open on Wednesday, with Dj Pieman playing up for it party tunes for people who are up for a party, whilst Paul Middleton’s Angst Band turns the air blue with rhythm and blues and swearing to boot.


I do some online DJ bizzle on on Saturdays 10pm to midnight and get repeated on Thursdays at 2pm, you can either listen to them again online at or you can chose to be one of the largest and rapidly growing youth movements in the UK right now buy just ignoring this bit completely…. I do swear a bit on my show, plus I swear like a frenchman on so don’t bother reading, and if you do, don’t bother complaining, no one listens anyway.

Thanks for reading, drink responsibly and don’t be loose with your affections.



Trev x x x


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